After losing my oldest and much loved friend in February I decided to take a break from writing to focus on other areas of my life. During this time another beautiful person from my peer group has dropped her robe and passed beyond the Veil. It brings home to me with great intensity that life is inordinately precious, miraculous and mind-boggling.
So with that in mind, although my fourth book, Time After Time is complete, I have no intention of publishing it. The truth is I don’t like it. It does not represent me and I feel I’m capable of creating so much more than a derivative, predictable and slightly embarrassing piece of work. There are two characters in it I do like and they may one day have a different vehicle.
I’ve been focusing on growing my garden, my friendships and my sense of self. Coming home to me, the temple of self, bringing my scattered energy and attention back to where it belongs so that I can live each day to the fullest, from a loving and kind heart. Understanding all I have to do is allow my Light to Shine. I don’t need to try. Just Shine. It will fall where it may without me striving and pushing. There are many terrible events unfolding across the world and I’m not immune to those effects on my wellbeing. That being said, I recognise that I can do very little to influence or alter many of those events elsewhere in the world. What I can do is remember this:
“Every day, here and at home, we are warned about the enemy. But who is the enemy? Is it the alien? Well, we are all alien to one another. Is it the one who believes differently than we do? No, oh no, my friends. The enemy is fear. The enemy is ignorance. The enemy is the one who tells you that you must hate that which is different. Because, in the end, that hate will turn on you. And that same hate will destroy you” Reverend Will Dexter, Babylon 5, Season 3, Episode 20
I’m in a fortunate position to CHOOSE how I think, speak and act towards myself and others. In the face of all that is unfolding, I reject the theology of fear and hatred. I aspire to hold my own centre in love and kindness, peace and calm. I aspire to respond rather than react; aspire to send that energy into the world through every interaction, be it with the bees, plants and vegetables in my garden; with pets, friends and family; with a stranger on the bus; with another road user, forest user; shop assistant, my writing and all those interactions we have on a daily basis.
And my efforts in this aspiration have gifted me a jewel in the form of sudden inspiration and the yen to start writing again. I’m now happily researching, structuring and planning a new series. I know this is right, as all the information is flowing to me on varied and synchronous wings.
As we start our approach to the Summer Solstice, the high point of our growth this year, I send you all my very heartfelt good wishes for an abundant harvest in all areas of your life.